Remote Access doesn't work away from home — but HomeKit devices still respond
In short
That exact split — AV devices unreachable remotely while HomeKit accessories keep working — almost always means the Remote Access address in your Home settings isn't your home's real public address. A common cause: looking up "my IP" while iCloud Private Relay is active returns a relay address, not your home's. Use a dynamic-DNS hostname instead of a raw IP, and make sure TCP port 47149 is forwarded to your primary controller.
Why HomeKit keeps working when nothing else does
HomeKit accessories route through Apple's own home hub, so they don't depend on Roomie's Remote Access path at all. Your AV devices — receivers, TVs, IR adapters — are relayed through your primary controller, which Roomie reaches from outside your network by dialing the Remote Access address directly. If that address is wrong, every AV command silently goes nowhere while HomeKit sails on. The split is the diagnostic.
The Private Relay trap
If you filled in the Remote Access address by searching "what is my IP" from a device with iCloud Private Relay (or "Limit IP Address Tracking") enabled, you got the address of an Apple relay server — not your home. Roomie then dials a stranger's edge server from anywhere outside your LAN. Turn off Private Relay before checking your address, or better, skip raw IPs entirely.
The durable fix: a hostname, not a number
Residential addresses also change over time, so even a correct IP eventually goes stale. Set up a free dynamic-DNS hostname (No-IP, DuckDNS, or similar) that tracks your home connection, enter that hostname as the Remote Access address, and forward TCP port 47149 on your router to the device acting as your primary controller. That combination survives address changes.
Still stuck?
Verify the hostname resolves to the same address your router's status page shows as its WAN address, and confirm the port forward targets the primary controller's LAN IP. If remote control still fails after that, contact support with diagnostics sent from the device you use away from home.
Distilled from real support conversations, with details generalized. Every setup differs — if this doesn't resolve it, contact support with diagnostics.
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